I know I’m not always the smartest person in the room, the most experienced, the most beautiful…I’m rarely the most creative, but I’m coming to understand that I’m often the most genuine. I’ve been surrounded lately by people who are solely motivated by bottom lines and appearances, which can be toxic for someone who is trying to make positive change. Now, I know I’m no beacon of truth 100% of the time, but my support, affection and interest in people is always pure. Always. I’m not one for the fake smile and laugh routine…people eventually see right through that sort of bullshit, and I feel like scum when I’m pretending to be grateful or interested in someone. I don’t know how people do it…

There are two people in particular I have in mind as I type this: one I used to really believe was a good person, the other I always had a profound distaste for. I think it’s really easy to play nice and show interest in someone when they can “do things for you” or when they’re just fun and make life easy. But boy….when the chips are down, when you’re at you worst…the mask really comes off. Either you’re faced with a true friend or a future enemy.

I truly believe that if someone cannot stand by you at your worst, then they don’t deserve you at your best. It’s a simple idea really, yet there are so many charlatans out there that you wind up moving along in the game of life never really sure if you’re with someone that will be there through it all. The ones that will love you when you make a huge mistake, or when you can’t cut a 5,000$ check, or have a hiccup when you’re trying to move them up the social ladder…why is it so hard for people to value one another, flaws and all, genuinely?